I Love Me.

I am watching them all. I think I am better. And I want to play with everyone. This looks like fun, even without television cameras and everyone wearing their best sensible shoes. I bet I am better than all the dogs. I wonder if mom will bet on me?

Just popped in to share some videos (the embed thing isn't working, but the links should) of me that mom took last night which will show that:

1.) I play well with others.

2.) Daddy is a cheap toy

3.) I am Wikkid Spoiled.

Mom is a sucker, and she KNOWS it!

I am ONE.

I am almost as bad at blogging as my mom is. But this is IMPORTANT!

I had a BIRTHDAY!! It was my first one. I liked it a lot.

Mom made me a cake. It was made with FISH and had cream cheese on top.

I shared some with Boo. Mom made me. I didn't really think he needed any.

And then there was a pile of presents ALL FOR ME! Mel & Boo did not like this part.

But now I just wonder, most of the time, which one should I play with first?

Trying

I will try to blog a little today. Mom is always so busy now. Summer is a busy time here, with chickens and things. She has DUCKS and won't let me eat those either, and TURKEYS which I also can't eat. In fact I get in trouble if I try. I got out with mom three or four times a week for walks or errands or visiting or all of those. I love the nursing home. Everyone is so nice and compliments me. Mom stands behind me and says I am spoiled, and a brat, but I don't think she means it. How could she? I am very good on the elevator now, and wheelchairs and walkers don't bother me usually. Sometimes if one moves differently or gets close I might shy away a little. Laundry carts, meal tray carts (I love those!), and medication carts don't bother me. I love the people, too. Mom still tells me to stay OFF and I have a hard time obeying. I want to get close to the people. They pet me and rub me and most of them let me give them kisses which I LOVE to do. Sometimes if I get over-excited mom has to make me calm down. It is hard not to get excited when you're young.

(Immediately after Mom saw this picture on the big screen, she cut my toenails off. She loves to do that and I hate it! I only stand because there's food after.)
I am very much all boy, all the time. I do not believe in sitting still for long. Sometimes I nap and then I HEAR things, like a bird or the wind, or something mom can't hear.

Then I WAKE UP and run to the noise. There are a lot of noises here between the chickens and the woods.

Mom has been finding new places I can go in to. I can go into CVS and Walgreens, which is really good for me. I have to be VERY good and mom says "act like a service dog" when we are inside. We walk sometimes on the bike path where there are other dogs. I was much better with other dogs before my testicles got so big. Mom says one of these days she's going to chop them off with scissors if I don't knock it off. I kind of like them, though, so I try to behave. I think she might just do it one of these days if I am not careful.

Nana is not dead, which is supposed to be a good thing, but I think she makes mom kind of crazy a lot of the time. She does not take care of herself, which she thinks will make her die faster. She may be right, but I heard mom say she'd outlive us all. I hope not. I kind of want my real mom back, the one who's not distracted and tense all the time. That's why I have not been blogging. It's exhausting trying to make mom smile at LEAST once a day!

Unexplained Absence, Explained.

A few people have been asking me lately why I haven't been blogging as much. Mom says we get a lot of something called email, which means people ask where I have been and what I've been doing. The truth is, not a lot. Mom's mother, Nana, has been kind of not so good lately. We used to go and see her at The Arbors, but now we go to a place called Charlene Manor, which is a nursing home. I think that means "more people that like to rub my ears" or it seems that way so far. Mom used to work at this place. I wonder if she misses it there. It seems nice to me.
I still go to the yarn store on some Fridays to deliver eggs. Some days I can't go anywhere at all because mom is at places where dogs my age, and with my minimal training, can't go. Apparently I have to have a special class before I can go to a place called "hospital". From what mom's been saying, they need me there! She says that once I finish my therapy dog certification I can go, but I can't do that until I am a year old. I think Nana will be gone by then. But I can maybe go and see other people who don't feel so good.
Other stuff I've been doing:

I play. Mom or dad try to throw the ball for me every morning, and sometimes if mom knows it's going to be a long day she leaves me with a bone to chew, a beef bone. I love them.

Learning to sleep out of my crate like a big boy, and not howl at mom or dad until after 6AM. This has been REALLY hard.

Hanging out with my friends. This is me and Jack at Dad's birthday party. I like Jack a lot.

Hanging out with my bros. This is brother B. He smells good.

Hanging with mom and dad on the deck in the evening when mom is done with Nana and dad is done with StupidWork. Mom says that StupidWork pays for my kibble so maybe I should shut up about it. But it's dumb. Both of them gone so much, it annoys me a LOT.
I have not been back to school yet. Mom says maybe soon, now that Nana is settled in a new place to live. Mom spent a lot of time this week cleaning out Nana's old house. Now all of her stuff is in our garage and it smells funny and not like our stuff at all. Mom says I may NOT pee on it, which seems pretty stupid to me. Then it would smell more like us. Speaking of pee. I had a urinary tract infection, which I don't think I understand, except that it means I get AMERICAN CHEESE twice a day! Mom says it is medicine. HAH! That's MY kind of medicine!

Oh. Mom brought home all these stuffies.

Then she said I could not have them. How fair is that? Votes, please! I think I should get to keep them. Mom says they can go someplace called eBay and I can have a hoof or an ear or a bone instead. I am not sure how I feel about that, but since she has the thumbs, I think I am stuck!

Who's a Winner?

I DID IT! I passed my Canine Good Citizen test! I KNEW I could! Mom says this is just the beginning for me, but for now I'd like to take a break from school I think. I'd still like to go out a lot and see people, but I need a break from the rigors of academia, just for a few weeks.

I should catch you up on my life lately, and then tell you all about test day!
It has been raining a LOT, almost every day. I am very sick of rain.

Rain means that we don't go out as much, even though mom bought me that dumb raincoat and said we'd go out anyway. I still get to go places in town most of the time.

But mostly we lay around and wait for it to stop raining. It's very boring. Mom has lots of things to do inside. But we don't. Sometimes mom goes out alone. I'd rather be taken along.
I visit the yarn store every week, and last week I got to go to a new store. It is called Good for the Soles, and they sold mom these cool new shoes she has. She had a question about her shoes, and Jill and Tim let me come right into the store! I was very good. I laid down next to mom, and even walked with her when we were testing out the shoes. The shoes are called minimalist shoes. I don't wear shoes, so I don't know what all the fuss is about. Mom doesn't wear shoes much either. I guess these shoes are sort of like being barefoot, which seems to make mom happy. Anyway, I liked Jill and Tim a lot and I hope we go back there some time. I got to ride with mom to take Nana for errands, and this time I got to sit in the back with my crate instead of being stuck in front with Nana. I like it in back better, I think. I can go in my crate and lay down, or I can stand in the middle between the seats and watch traffic. I don't wear my harness, but my leash is bucked into a seat belt for safety.
Last weekend mom was gone a LOT. On Saturday Girl and Gerbil came and got her and took her away for HOURS. It was for a thing called a bridal shower for Shannon. I have met Shannon, and I liked her, but I don't see why she needed people to give her a shower. Mom gives me a shower and there's no audience, and no presents. Well, except for a piece of kibble if I am good. Anyway, mom was gone for HOURS. Then on Sunday she took off without me again - this time to teach a knitting class. This really made me mad. She came home smelling JUST LIKE the YARN STORE. I do not understand why I did not get to go! Monday she went away and bought a new refrigerator and left me here.
When mom comes home after days like this I prefer it if she sits in her chair and knits, or lays down with me on the couch.

I don't really like it if she decides she has "things to do" that don't involve me. Sometimes I get very angry. Sometimes, to let mom know that I am angry, I do bad stuff.
Someone named Kimberly, who is called somebunnyslove by some people, was coming to see mom today, so yesterday and this morning mom was all about chores and cleaning. She cleaned inside of the house. She cleaned part of the barn. None of this had anything to do with me. So this morning, when she dropped some yarn while she was tidying up and "putting things in their right place", I stole it.
And I made sure she knew I was not happy with her.

It turns out the yarn I took is not just any yarn. It is called Artyarns Cashmere Glitter, and it is very expensive. Mom used it for a design, and this was a leftover ball. "...almost a whole SKEIN!" is what mom yelled when she caught me. I didn't much care. I just went on with my business. Serves her right. She goes off without me all weekend, and again on Monday, and then she cleans and tidies and is out in the bar on Tuesday. But she seemed pretty angry about this yarn.
She tried to fix the yarn before the Kimberly girl came. That just meant she was ignoring me even more. I got kind of pouty. This was supposed to make her notice me MORE, not ignore me so she could fix the yarn! Finally she gave up on the yarn, but she still didn't talk much to me.
Kimberly came and I met her and she was nice to me. I liked her. She and mom sat at the table, which was also NOT ABOUT ME. I whined and paced and said I needed to pee, when really I didn't need to that much. I just wanted attention. Maybe I should have been nicer to them. Because look what Kimberly did!

She FIXED my mess. In the end she made a nice neat ball of yarn out of it! Mom was MUCH happier after that.
But then mom LEFT again! She said she had an interview with Auntie Kathy, which makes no sense to me. We see Aunt Kathy almost every week! What made today different? Mom said it was "radio". Then she changed her story and said I could not come along because I was grounded for killing the yarn. I think she lied. I think the radio place doesn't like dogs. I got left behind AGAIN!
When mom came home from the radio thing I went out and went potty and helped her do chores. She said we would go for a walk, but then she didn't take me and didn't take me and didn't take me, and then all of a sudden it was 5:30 and dad was home, and it was almost time to leave for school. Mom said we would go early and take a walk around town before my big test. I wasn't sure how I felt about that, but it was alright.
Here's what I saw on my walk:
First I saw a very big, very loud truck that scared me.
Next I saw people going to eat at Hope and Olive. The lady said I was very well behaved.
I laid down on Main Street, and mom made me do a couple of turns, left and right.
I saw a man who said I was a fox.
Then I saw a lady on Main Street pushing a little shopping cart just like the one at school and the one Nana has. I stopped and sat down so she could bend over and pet me. She said I was very handsome, which I am, and she rubbed my ears and said they were soft. Next I saw a shifty guy who made me nervous, and mom said she agreed, he made her nervous too.
Then we went down Bank Row, and I saw a strange dog at MagPie. I sniffed the air, but didn't even try to stop to say hello.
I had to cross the street in front of Village Pizza. We walked back up Bank Row by the Town Hall. There was a loud funny-acting lady with a cigarette and a big bright bag on a bench there. She asked if she could pet me, so mom brought me over and she petted me. I sat and did not jump up. The lady acted very funny and kind of scared me, but I sat. Next we walked past a group of young people that mom called "sketchy", but they liked me and I wagged and was polite anyway. I sat and stayed in front of a place mom called Clark's even when a motorcycle stopped to let us cross. I HATE motorcycles, but I went anyway and was not afraid. I jumped a little when the motorcycle drove away. We crossed Federal Street behind another sketchy young person - there's a lot of them in Greenfield now, mom says. We walked to the library and crossed the street again and I got to head back to the car and dog school. I had to lay down on Hope Street outside of the church where people were going in and coming out for some kind of meeting. I had to see that loud truck again, and it did not scare me as much, but I also didn't want mom getting any ideas about laying down in front of it, so I encouraged her to walk faster. We got back to school and mom gave me a drink and let me rest for a while.
All along the walk I had to stop at every intersection. Mom would say "halt", and I would sit down and wait until she said forward. We practiced some turns, and some laying down and sitting.
The reason why I am telling you all of this is because when we got back to the car mom patted my head and said something really, really important. She said "You are an amazingly good boy, and even if you don't pass, you are still the BEST canine citizen in the whole world. It's OK with me if this test doesn't go well, because I KNOW you are a Canine Good Citizen!" That made me feel good.
We went inside before testing time and mom did some paperwork. I was a little nervous. There were a lot of dogs. The new CGC class, and the beginner class and a puppy kindergarten were all there. That is a LOT of dog smell. When the classes were over, I got to take my test again. I had some bumpy spots, I wasn't perfect, but I did what mattered most, and I passed!
Tomorrow strange men are coming to deliver the new refrigerator. And then on Friday I get to go to the yarn store and tell EVERYONE that I PASSED!
I remember when I came here I was scared. I didn't need to be. This is right where I belong - with a mom who loves me and believes in me, even when I am not perfect. So who's a winner now? ME!

See you soon!

Epic Fail.

Uncle Steve calls me "EF" (that means Epic Fail) and dad referred to my class last night as GED Prep. I don't think this is a compliment. Mom got mad and said she had a GED, and a college degree, and what did dad mean, exactly? Dad looked kind of worried for his safety after that. That made me feel a little better.
Mom has made me do a ton of things since my bad night. We go into town a lot more. I have to lay down all the time, and especially in front of distractions. I have to lay down a lot. Last night I had a class that mom said would decide whether I could be retested any time soon or not. I tried my best. It was really hard. There was a German Shepherd who barked at me. He still has his boy-bits, like me, but I think he may be older than I am. He ignored most of the other dogs and barked at me all during class. I tried really hard to be good, and I was good, mostly. I had a couple of moments. It is hard to be good when someone is trying to get you to respond to them. There was also a Rottweiler, a pitbull, and two Old English Sheepdogs, two children, and new strange people. They all seemed much nicer than the shepherd. I did ok, mom said. Not perfect, not horrible. She says I can try the test again, but if I fail I have to go back into the class with the shepherd. I hope I pass.
I definitely have a different attitude about things now. Mom says that she thinks the bigger my testicles get the smaller my brain gets. I don't know if that's true. I do know that I feel different now. I feel something I don't really understand. Mom says it's called hormones and I'd better get used to it.
We went to the vet last week, not for me but to get medicine for Boo. He has arthritis in his hips and mm gives him a shot once a week to help. it helps a lot. Maybe too much, because now he wants to steal all my stuff. Before he didn't care what I had, he just laid around and sighed and panted a lot. I got on the scale. I weigh 23 pounds.
We went for a walk this week in New Hampshire. I got a tick. The last tick I had was actually biting me. This one was just walking on my leg. Mom does not like ticks, I guess. She ground it up with two rocks into tiny pieces and all it did was walk on me. Mom has issues!
Before our walk mom went shopping at two stores and left me in the car. It was raining and dark and I had my crate and the windows were open. Mom went very fast. It was not hot. Mom says that soon we won't be able to do that because it will be summer. It bothers me that I can't go in ALL stores! I like being with mom on errand day. After mom did her errands we went to Petco. First we walked around the big building where Petco and some other stores are. It's in a city with noise and cars and people and dogs. Mom made me lay down right there next to the city noise and traffic. Then inside Petco she made me lay down in front of a lady with three little kids and a shopping cart. I had to stay until they went by.
I do think mom would be easier on me if I had just done what I was supposed to during that stupid test. I don't know if I like hormones very much if they make me do stupid things.

I did well and mom let me pick two toys out of the clearance bin. I fell asleep on them as soon as we were in the car. Shopping is very hard work!